I am currently reading “The Second Sex” by Simone De Beauvoir. I usually do most of my reading on the commute to and from work and today as I was getting off the train I was stopped by an old lady who asked me if I enjoyed reading the book. She looked up at me and put her hand on her heart and said “I didn’t think anyone still read that. It makes me so happy to see it, that was our bible back then”. The look in her eye was so emotional I didn’t know how to react. I wish I had stopped to speak to her more, but we were both swept up in the crowds leaving the train and heading in opposite directions. It was one of those rare brief moments in my life that I will always remember.
It made me think of where our so called “feminism” stands today. “Feminists” themselves are still considered on the fringe of society. I have never really understood why this is. The fact that I have been asked by other girls “oh, so you’re a feminist?” is absolutely shocking to me. Shouldn’t we all be feminists? Being a feminist is nothing more than standing up and saying that you deserve to be treated with the dignity of a human being. Not treated as a man per se, but a human. I’m pretty sure that any girl (or woman if you’d rather) doesn’t want to be told what they can and cannot do, simply based on their gender.
The stereotype of a feminist brings to mind the myth of the burkenstock wearing, short-haired, man hating lesbians. For any of you that have seen the movie PCU, the style of the “womynists” would be indicative of this stereotype. The fact is, that is a total myth, these type of feminists don’t really exist. I consider myself a feminist, and yes, while I would rather spend my days in jeans and a t-shirt rather than a pretty pink dress doesn’t mean I fit into that extreme at all. I am far from man-hating, and in fact have more male friends in my life than female ones, and while I have wandered down the road of sexual exploration, I am pretty sure that I am not a lesbian.
It’s disappointing that more girls/women feel that there is nothing left to stand up for, or that mistreatment and inequality only happens in third world countries. In reality our work is far from done. Yes, women have seen an enormous increase and freedom since the 1950’s but there is still more to go. Beauvoir wrote “The Second Sex” in 1949 and it is shocking to me that most of what she says is still relevant today. While women may have seen and increase in freedom or “equality” male attitudes have not really changed in that same time. Boys (I have met very few actual men in my life) still hold the same biased perceptions of female behavior and thinking. On the other sided however, as a girl who spends most of her time around boys, I sometimes find that these perceptions are not always totally out of line….but that is a topic for another day.
As I explore feminism more on an intellectual and academic level I wonder if I will be able to find the reasons why, we as females/women/girls, have dropped our banners and stopped demanding what should be ours as fellow human beings. I wonder if I will reach my old age and see a young girl reading the books that radically changed my life when I was their age? My hope is that maybe they won’t have to. Maybe the future does hold an equal rights amendment to the constitution, women in combat roles in the military, and the true acceptance of those who do not want marriage or children in their lives (it is my belief that women are not accepted when they do not want children or marriage. It is still seen as a necessary and sought after step in life, that if a woman does not reach it is made to feel like she is missing out on something, but again more on that later….).
So thank you little old lady on the train. You helped me realize how much your generation accomplished in your lifetime, and how big of a deal it really was, and hopefully that our generation can go on to accomplish even more. You still have an impact on the world because you have had an impact on me.
Love the story about the old lady! Its a shame you weren’t able to speak with her more. I am sure she would have had interesting stories to tell.
I am also baffled when girls/women say they are not feminists. However, I think that is due to the myths and stereotypes. I would hope that women have some level of feminism in them! What I see is that many women are turn off by the “victimization” of feminism. That is something the movement (which is quasi-dead) has to adress. There is also the lack of scholarly education on the subject. I feel that everytime I speak about feminism I am force to defined it (Belief in the social, political, and economic equality of the sexes) because there is so much cocaphony regarding the movement and the theories behind it.
I recomend this blog for you http://www.feministing.com/ which I read daily and it has excellent posts regarding feminism and women’s rights in the world.
Keep posting!
